Saturday, June 30, 2007

A Tale of Two Tails

My pet human calls me over to the apothecary chest in the spare bedroom. She points to another lizard tail.

"Is this the same lizard? Or are there two in the house?" she says.



hehehehehehehe


Stay tuned. Next week I will announce a contest to guess the location of the lizard(s) body(ies)!

Skittles, The Huntress

I love messing with my pet human's head!

Friday, June 29, 2007

Formerly Feral

Hey! What's this dog doing in my favorite portrait spot? Is it real?


Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Wordless Wednesday

My Pet Human calls me over to the hallway. She points to the floor and says:

"Skittles, where's the body? You know what I'm talking about. There's the tail, where's the body?"


I ignore her. I say nothing. This is Wordless Wednesday.

"Skittles!" she says, "I remember the time I put my foot into my shoe, only to find a dead lizard body inside. I don't want a repeat. Where's the body???"

I ignore her. I say nothing. This is Wordless Wednesday.



I saunter out to the garden. I do not look back. I say nothing. This is Wordless Wednesday.





hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe!

Thoughts On "Temping"

Scroll Down For Yoga Tuesday

My pet human insists on using the computer today. I will grant her this one time. She likes the work of an author named Kirby Olson, whose blog is Lutheran Surrealism. He is a professor at SUNY-Delhi, and mostly the followers of his blog have a wide variety of views, and sometimes have real cat fights in the comments box. She has read his book, Temping, and today will post her review of the book.



You can visit his blog here and wish him well in his journey to being a world famous author.

Just remember, his site is under new construction, and he could probably benefit from the cat blogging help center at Skeezix' blog.



Temping

By Kirby Olson

Black Heron Press, 2006

Last year I came across a blog called Lutheran Surrealism, posted by Kirby Olson, who is currently an associate professor of philosophy and literature at SUNY Delhi. Originally I followed the blog for two main reasons. First, I had been raised Lutheran, and Olson’s characterizations of Lutheran culture left me rolling with laughter. Secondly, he frequently debated philosophy with a friend of his, Carl Sachs, also a professor of philosophy. I found those debates to be very enlightening and educational, since after I got past Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle in school, I fell asleep in philosophy class.

Eventually I began reading some of Olson’s other works, in particular a book of poetry called, “Waiting for the Rapture,” and a novel entitled, “Temping.” I posted my thoughts on Olson’s poetry here. Today I post my thoughts regarding Temping.


Temping

Homer meets P.T. Barnum in this mock heroic epic of a semi-autobiography. The protagonist, Milhouse Moot, leads a mostly meaningless life as he goes from temp job to temp job. He revels in his lack of personal relationships, and at age 38, Moot is still a virgin. That’s easy to accept as plausible since Moot leads life with his nose buried in obscure philosophy. He loves ugliness and despises beauty.

Although Moot outwardly professes to prefer his lonely, solitary existence, the reader learns otherwise when he takes the first step on his odyssey by visiting a crass and blunt woman psychiatrist.

Moot tells her in his first visit:

“I like temping. ‘I see nothing wrong with it,’ I lied. I was acutely disgusted with my existence....yet I was too lazy to do anything about it.....There was always more philosophy to read. If this shrink thought I was going to be an easy cure, then she should have read Freud’s treatise on jokes.”


Moot then spends the entire rest of his 50 minute hour with the shrink detailing a lengthy battle with a former boss, which took the form of one-on-one basketball. The basketball battle, which Moot almost loses because of a well timed foul, becomes a precursor to an even greater battle with a future boss and romantic rival.

Despite his attempts to divert the shrink with his story, she gives him blunt advice: get drunk, get laid.

Moot’s attempt to follow this advice lands him in a brothel in Hong Kong, with a friend, Billy Whims, another writer wanna-be leading a life of temporary existence. This particular scene, in which poor, pathetic Moot does not get laid and instead faints, should have any reader in stitches. While in Hong Kong, Moot finds Liisa, a former student of his and soon to be the love of his life, performing as an acrobat in the circus.

This is just the beginning of Moot’s quest for permanence and beauty in his life. In his odyssey for love, marriage, and family, Moot takes his readers on a journey to grad school, then on to Finland with Lissa, who had “mistakenly married” him, then on to the Tampere Clown School, where clowning is serious business in academia.

Moot faces his second great epic battle at Tampere against an arch nemesis, Marcel Nations, head of the department for which Moot teaches. Nations, a midget, had been a world class clown. Yet now with youth behind him, he is a giant the world of comedic academia, solely for the production of his dissertation on Alexander Pope. Although past his prime, Nations remains a world class womanizer. Moot discovers Nations was a former lover of his wife, Liisa, and the stage is set for jealous politics between boss and employee.

Nations ups the ante with a challenge:

“This rivalry has gone on long enough. Let’s move it into the open. Name a sport, Milhouse. Name any sport. If I beat you, I sleep with your wife. If you beat me, you can have my senior salary, and I’ll take your minuscule one.”


Moot chooses badminton. To tell more would be to spoil the plot.

When I finished reading Temping, I had a sense of deja vu. Just as I had originally planned to use “Waiting for the Rapture,” to become more acquainted with certain poets Olson quotes on his blog, I had planned to use “Temping,” as an opportunity to become better versed in post modern philosophy. I spent a good amount of time trying to match Olson’s characters to certain philosophers, i.e. the shrink represents Freud, etc. Who represented Proust, Sade, Duchamp? Liisa obviously falls into the Lutheran camp. My one and only criticism is that Olson refers to so many philosophers quite casually. My knowledge of philosophy will never match that of a university professor who specializes in this discipline. I couldn't shake the sense that I missed a certain depth to the plot and characters since I did not fully understand Kant, Kierkegaard, Proust, Nietzsche, Jarry, Tate, Kelly, among other names found in Temping.

In addition, this served to divert my attention from the overall story. Once again, to me at least, Olson is sharing the story of his journey back to faith, family, and friends, this time with a humorous, yet sometimes poignant angle. I found it easier to understand his universal message through his poetry, which was not spreckled with great names of philosophers.

At the same time, Temping provides the most complete explanation, that I have found, by Olson, of his journey back to the church. On the very first post of his blog, he comments to Andrew:

Andrew,
The order of my introduction into Lutheran surrealism was like this: I was raised in a Lutheran church but rebelled at age 12, and never went back. Then, about four years ago when I was 42, my daughter was baptized in a Lutheran church in a tiny village in Finland. I wept uncontrollably for about an hour as I heard those childhood hymns being sung."

This explanation seemed vague to me, as did other explanations provided on his blog. And I have read similar explanations elsewhere on his blog. How does music alone convert some one back to the church? But Temping goes further, with this description of his eldest child's baptism:

"In the morning we went to the church for the baby to be baptized. The pastor held the baby against his white and green robes, and began to recite the magical words. I felt Christ come into my heart. I had never experienced this before. Then the congregation began to sing.....I held the baby and saw God in him, and in all the world. As I tried to sing the words of the hymn, I began to weep."

This explanation helped me to understand a little better how Olson ended up as a staunch Lutheran later in life.

During his final visit to the psychiatrist, the shrink asks Moot if he has a philosophy for life.

"Life is a horrible, demented circus in which we look at others as if they are horrible mistakes, only in order to laugh. It is only with pain that we can learn to really laugh. There is however something higher than laughter that takes place when we look up into the stars or into our lover's face. That is, beyond the natural comedy, by looking up in quiet and wonder, and allowing the beauty of Christ to walk within us."
Apparently, getting drunk and getting laid did wonders for Milhouse Moot.

Temping tells a heartwarming story of finding permanence, beauty, love, family, and God, with crack-up characters and scenarios. Hmmmmm, maybe the Coen brothers will make it into a movie.

WW


p.s. the book should be rated R for language.





Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Yoga Class

Once again, I was sleeping soundly, this time in the famous "Princess and the Pea" position, when my pet human freaked out.

"Skittles! Your yoga students are about to arrive. Wake up!


When will she learn that I am always prepared. Deep breath.......stretch........

Limber up......................



Let's all go to the barbecue patio for yoga today. It's nice and sunny, and we are having barbecue for snacks afterwards. SlyCat is still on vacation, so I would appreciate a volunteer to man the grill.

(click >, then play)



Very good everyone! Much improvement. Let's have some snacks now....

Shrimp on the barbie......and salmon too!

Saturday, June 23, 2007

STUMP #2-The Veep


Yesterday, Vice President Dick Cheney announced his office is not a part of the Executive Branch, but actually a part of the Legislative Branch. Read the news here.

Apparently his office does not want to submit to an executive order which requires the National Archives' Information Security Office to review how his office handles classified information.

He argues that his only Constitutional duty is that of President of the Senate, and his paycheck comes from the Senate. His office does not have to comply with laws governing the Executive Branch alone.

MY OFFICIAL OPINION: THIS IS SOME OF THE BEST HAIR SPLITTING AND DIVERSIONARY TACTICS I HAVE EVER WITNESSED! DO THE NAMES LIBBY AND ARMITRAGE MEAN ANYTHING?

Congressman Henry Waxman, D-California, in addition to having an very unattractive mustache, went on the attack: "I question both the legality and wisdom of your actions," he wrote to Cheney.

Whoa Nelly!

MY OFFICIAL OPINION: THE REAL ISSUE IS THIS: WHY IS THE LEGISLATURE EXEMPT FROM THIS LAW? WHY DOESN'T THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES' INFORMATION SECURITY OFFICE REVIEW HOW CONGRESS HANDLES (LEAKS!) CLASSIFIED INFORMATION?

Yes, this is some world class finger pointing on all sides.

Skittles, The Huntress
The American Patriot Cat Party

Friday, June 22, 2007

The Suitor Returns

Uh, oh! Sam, The Marmalade Cat is back to court Skittles. See the laser eyes directed at SlyCat? I hope SlyCat can blog again soon. Skittles misses him.
"Is that a parrot?"

posted by the Pet Human.

Official Stump #1-Mud Slinging


It is time for me to begin expressing my views and opinions in this campaign for president. And allow me to sling some mud too.

Yesterday Hillary Clinton posted a video on her website. You can see it here. She and hubby Bill sit down in a diner to announce the "winning campaign song." She makes him eat carrots.


My Official Opinion: THIS IS MONUMENTALLY STUPID!


What does this have to do with running our government and leading the nation?

Some of you might say, well Hillary is trying to reach out to the YouTube generation. Nonsense and hogwash! Our teens and twenty-somethings are not idiots! They know just as well as the old geezers that politics is serious stuff. Yes, it's nice to lighten the mood every now and then. But with troops killed every day in Iraq, the national debt growing, possible recession, shredded foreign policy, nuclear proliferation, etc., now is NOT the time!

Bad timing, Billary!

Sincerely,

Skittles, The Cat

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Thursday Thirteen

This is my first time participating in Thursday Thirteen! Here goes:

13 things I like about my pet human:

1. she taught me yoga and how to relax. So now I am not anti-social
2. she feeds me whatever I want, and if I don't like what she gives me, she will continue to open cans of food until I say ok.
3. she is very gentle and sweet
4. she lets me go outside. This is good, because I could never be an all indoor kitty. I would go stir crazy.
5. she lets me eat as many lizards as I like
6. she shares the computer with me
7. she understands that what I want is mine.....like the saddle blanket....mine, mine, mine!
8. I like her mom
9. she is patient
10.she works hard at keeping my garden nice
11. she lets me have friends over
12. she gave me a teddy bear
13. she loves me!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

New Cat In Town??????


I thought I found a new friend outside the bedroom door by the side deck. I thought maybe he was late to the yoga class.

My pet human started yelling.....STAY AWAY, STAY AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Uuuuggggghhhhhhhhhh.......................what's that smell?

100th Post!!!!!!

WOW!!!!! This is my 100th post. So glad you all could join me for summer yoga classes.

Please spread out your mat, and find a comfortable spot on it. Take a deep breath in through your nose...........hold, hold, hold,...............now exhale through your mouth slowly.

Follow along:


Excellent class, everyone!!!!!

Help yourself to goodies.


















































See you next Tuesday for Yoga!
Here's a close up of the Half Lord of the Fishes. Again, note the extension of the mandible and maxilla. Practice at home.


Luv,
Skittles, The Huntress

Sunday, June 17, 2007

The Bedspread Solution

HA!!!! I won't sleep on TOP of the bedspread. I will sleep UNDER the bedspread.

PROBLEM SOLVED!

I am sooooooo smart.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Snoozy Sunday

I was sleeping soundly, when I heard my pet human.

"Skittles! Wake up!!


"What?" I said.

"I know where you have been sleeping. Look at the mess!"

You must stop rolling in the dirt, and then coming into the house to sleep on the white bedspread. I insist."



"Who says???" I demanded to know.

"My dear sweet Skittles, I say so this time. This bedspread belonged to my grandmother, your great grandmother, and I cannot wash it so frequently. It will fall apart.

"Oh, alright! I'll take a bath! But who are you to be demanding of me????" I said.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Formerly Feral

Hey!!! I am "formerly" feral. Now I enjoy beautiful African art. (and I know all the in's and out's of socially acceptable hygiene.)

The Presidential Debates are coming up soon. Skeezix will be the Moderator for the debates. Currently he is accepting suggested questions to ask the Candidates. Please visit his site if you wish to submit a question to the Candidates.


Skittles, The Huntress

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Questions for the Debate

You can post questions for the presidential candidates in the upcoming debate at Skeezix blog.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/scratchingpost/

Skeezix will be the moderator.

Skittles, The Huntress

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Yoga Classes For All Levels

Yoga classes begin next Tuesday, June 19th, here on the side deck. All levels of yoga students are welcome.

Yoga is a wonderful relaxation technique. In addition, practicing yoga improves physical and mental stamina, and flexibility. We all know how important these attributes are to cats everywhere.

RESERVATIONS ARE REQUIRED AS THERE IS LIMITED SPACE ON THE DECK!!!! PLEASE LEAVE A NOTE BELOW IF YOU WISH TO PARTICIPATE.

BYOM

Skittles, The Huntress

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Spotty Sunday



At first I thought Spotty Sunday was about showing my spots. But then I spotted a new interloper. He's more than twice my size, even bigger than Sam, The Marmalade Cat.

I don't know his name, or where he lives, but I hissed and spat at him. I screamed and yelled at the top of my lungs. Of course, the best defense is an aggressive offense, so I attacked him.

He didn't seem too perturbed. Then my Pet Human came out to see the ruckus, and she threatened him with the broom.

He sort of sauntered off at his own speed. Arrogant jackass! In my yard!

Skittles, The Huntress

Friday, June 08, 2007

Sam's Fantasies

Sam, The Marmalade Cat, still dreams about Skittles, even though she belongs to SlyCat.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

What Doesn't Belong?


Let's see.......

beautiful plants
beautiful brickwork
beautiful sunshine
beautiful tabby
tupperware

What's it doing here anyway???????

Skittles, The Huntress

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Tummy Tuesday

Advanced Bikram Yoga lends itself well to Tummy Tuesday. This position is called the Lotus, with a side twist.

Anyone wanna pet me???

Luv,

Skittles, The Huntress

Monday, June 04, 2007

Cat of the Day

Wow! I am Cat of the Day!

I am so honored. I don't know what to say. I know some of my faithful followers know my biography, yet I am so happy that Emma would spread the word to an even greater audience.

I want all my fellow traumatized feline friends to know that it does get better! Hang in there, and if this post does one kitty good, then it was all worth it.

To all the Pet Humans: don't give up on those who have had a hard life. We will come around with lots of food and love. We may even recover enough to aspire to be President!

Special thanks goes to my Auntie April in Oxnard for rescuing me from the warehouse.

Luv,
Skittles, The Huntress

Saturday, June 30, 2007

A Tale of Two Tails

My pet human calls me over to the apothecary chest in the spare bedroom. She points to another lizard tail.

"Is this the same lizard? Or are there two in the house?" she says.



hehehehehehehe


Stay tuned. Next week I will announce a contest to guess the location of the lizard(s) body(ies)!

Skittles, The Huntress

I love messing with my pet human's head!

Friday, June 29, 2007

Formerly Feral

Hey! What's this dog doing in my favorite portrait spot? Is it real?


Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Wordless Wednesday

My Pet Human calls me over to the hallway. She points to the floor and says:

"Skittles, where's the body? You know what I'm talking about. There's the tail, where's the body?"


I ignore her. I say nothing. This is Wordless Wednesday.

"Skittles!" she says, "I remember the time I put my foot into my shoe, only to find a dead lizard body inside. I don't want a repeat. Where's the body???"

I ignore her. I say nothing. This is Wordless Wednesday.



I saunter out to the garden. I do not look back. I say nothing. This is Wordless Wednesday.





hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe!

Thoughts On "Temping"

Scroll Down For Yoga Tuesday

My pet human insists on using the computer today. I will grant her this one time. She likes the work of an author named Kirby Olson, whose blog is Lutheran Surrealism. He is a professor at SUNY-Delhi, and mostly the followers of his blog have a wide variety of views, and sometimes have real cat fights in the comments box. She has read his book, Temping, and today will post her review of the book.



You can visit his blog here and wish him well in his journey to being a world famous author.

Just remember, his site is under new construction, and he could probably benefit from the cat blogging help center at Skeezix' blog.



Temping

By Kirby Olson

Black Heron Press, 2006

Last year I came across a blog called Lutheran Surrealism, posted by Kirby Olson, who is currently an associate professor of philosophy and literature at SUNY Delhi. Originally I followed the blog for two main reasons. First, I had been raised Lutheran, and Olson’s characterizations of Lutheran culture left me rolling with laughter. Secondly, he frequently debated philosophy with a friend of his, Carl Sachs, also a professor of philosophy. I found those debates to be very enlightening and educational, since after I got past Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle in school, I fell asleep in philosophy class.

Eventually I began reading some of Olson’s other works, in particular a book of poetry called, “Waiting for the Rapture,” and a novel entitled, “Temping.” I posted my thoughts on Olson’s poetry here. Today I post my thoughts regarding Temping.


Temping

Homer meets P.T. Barnum in this mock heroic epic of a semi-autobiography. The protagonist, Milhouse Moot, leads a mostly meaningless life as he goes from temp job to temp job. He revels in his lack of personal relationships, and at age 38, Moot is still a virgin. That’s easy to accept as plausible since Moot leads life with his nose buried in obscure philosophy. He loves ugliness and despises beauty.

Although Moot outwardly professes to prefer his lonely, solitary existence, the reader learns otherwise when he takes the first step on his odyssey by visiting a crass and blunt woman psychiatrist.

Moot tells her in his first visit:

“I like temping. ‘I see nothing wrong with it,’ I lied. I was acutely disgusted with my existence....yet I was too lazy to do anything about it.....There was always more philosophy to read. If this shrink thought I was going to be an easy cure, then she should have read Freud’s treatise on jokes.”


Moot then spends the entire rest of his 50 minute hour with the shrink detailing a lengthy battle with a former boss, which took the form of one-on-one basketball. The basketball battle, which Moot almost loses because of a well timed foul, becomes a precursor to an even greater battle with a future boss and romantic rival.

Despite his attempts to divert the shrink with his story, she gives him blunt advice: get drunk, get laid.

Moot’s attempt to follow this advice lands him in a brothel in Hong Kong, with a friend, Billy Whims, another writer wanna-be leading a life of temporary existence. This particular scene, in which poor, pathetic Moot does not get laid and instead faints, should have any reader in stitches. While in Hong Kong, Moot finds Liisa, a former student of his and soon to be the love of his life, performing as an acrobat in the circus.

This is just the beginning of Moot’s quest for permanence and beauty in his life. In his odyssey for love, marriage, and family, Moot takes his readers on a journey to grad school, then on to Finland with Lissa, who had “mistakenly married” him, then on to the Tampere Clown School, where clowning is serious business in academia.

Moot faces his second great epic battle at Tampere against an arch nemesis, Marcel Nations, head of the department for which Moot teaches. Nations, a midget, had been a world class clown. Yet now with youth behind him, he is a giant the world of comedic academia, solely for the production of his dissertation on Alexander Pope. Although past his prime, Nations remains a world class womanizer. Moot discovers Nations was a former lover of his wife, Liisa, and the stage is set for jealous politics between boss and employee.

Nations ups the ante with a challenge:

“This rivalry has gone on long enough. Let’s move it into the open. Name a sport, Milhouse. Name any sport. If I beat you, I sleep with your wife. If you beat me, you can have my senior salary, and I’ll take your minuscule one.”


Moot chooses badminton. To tell more would be to spoil the plot.

When I finished reading Temping, I had a sense of deja vu. Just as I had originally planned to use “Waiting for the Rapture,” to become more acquainted with certain poets Olson quotes on his blog, I had planned to use “Temping,” as an opportunity to become better versed in post modern philosophy. I spent a good amount of time trying to match Olson’s characters to certain philosophers, i.e. the shrink represents Freud, etc. Who represented Proust, Sade, Duchamp? Liisa obviously falls into the Lutheran camp. My one and only criticism is that Olson refers to so many philosophers quite casually. My knowledge of philosophy will never match that of a university professor who specializes in this discipline. I couldn't shake the sense that I missed a certain depth to the plot and characters since I did not fully understand Kant, Kierkegaard, Proust, Nietzsche, Jarry, Tate, Kelly, among other names found in Temping.

In addition, this served to divert my attention from the overall story. Once again, to me at least, Olson is sharing the story of his journey back to faith, family, and friends, this time with a humorous, yet sometimes poignant angle. I found it easier to understand his universal message through his poetry, which was not spreckled with great names of philosophers.

At the same time, Temping provides the most complete explanation, that I have found, by Olson, of his journey back to the church. On the very first post of his blog, he comments to Andrew:

Andrew,
The order of my introduction into Lutheran surrealism was like this: I was raised in a Lutheran church but rebelled at age 12, and never went back. Then, about four years ago when I was 42, my daughter was baptized in a Lutheran church in a tiny village in Finland. I wept uncontrollably for about an hour as I heard those childhood hymns being sung."

This explanation seemed vague to me, as did other explanations provided on his blog. And I have read similar explanations elsewhere on his blog. How does music alone convert some one back to the church? But Temping goes further, with this description of his eldest child's baptism:

"In the morning we went to the church for the baby to be baptized. The pastor held the baby against his white and green robes, and began to recite the magical words. I felt Christ come into my heart. I had never experienced this before. Then the congregation began to sing.....I held the baby and saw God in him, and in all the world. As I tried to sing the words of the hymn, I began to weep."

This explanation helped me to understand a little better how Olson ended up as a staunch Lutheran later in life.

During his final visit to the psychiatrist, the shrink asks Moot if he has a philosophy for life.

"Life is a horrible, demented circus in which we look at others as if they are horrible mistakes, only in order to laugh. It is only with pain that we can learn to really laugh. There is however something higher than laughter that takes place when we look up into the stars or into our lover's face. That is, beyond the natural comedy, by looking up in quiet and wonder, and allowing the beauty of Christ to walk within us."
Apparently, getting drunk and getting laid did wonders for Milhouse Moot.

Temping tells a heartwarming story of finding permanence, beauty, love, family, and God, with crack-up characters and scenarios. Hmmmmm, maybe the Coen brothers will make it into a movie.

WW


p.s. the book should be rated R for language.





Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Yoga Class

Once again, I was sleeping soundly, this time in the famous "Princess and the Pea" position, when my pet human freaked out.

"Skittles! Your yoga students are about to arrive. Wake up!


When will she learn that I am always prepared. Deep breath.......stretch........

Limber up......................



Let's all go to the barbecue patio for yoga today. It's nice and sunny, and we are having barbecue for snacks afterwards. SlyCat is still on vacation, so I would appreciate a volunteer to man the grill.

(click >, then play)



Very good everyone! Much improvement. Let's have some snacks now....

Shrimp on the barbie......and salmon too!

Saturday, June 23, 2007

STUMP #2-The Veep


Yesterday, Vice President Dick Cheney announced his office is not a part of the Executive Branch, but actually a part of the Legislative Branch. Read the news here.

Apparently his office does not want to submit to an executive order which requires the National Archives' Information Security Office to review how his office handles classified information.

He argues that his only Constitutional duty is that of President of the Senate, and his paycheck comes from the Senate. His office does not have to comply with laws governing the Executive Branch alone.

MY OFFICIAL OPINION: THIS IS SOME OF THE BEST HAIR SPLITTING AND DIVERSIONARY TACTICS I HAVE EVER WITNESSED! DO THE NAMES LIBBY AND ARMITRAGE MEAN ANYTHING?

Congressman Henry Waxman, D-California, in addition to having an very unattractive mustache, went on the attack: "I question both the legality and wisdom of your actions," he wrote to Cheney.

Whoa Nelly!

MY OFFICIAL OPINION: THE REAL ISSUE IS THIS: WHY IS THE LEGISLATURE EXEMPT FROM THIS LAW? WHY DOESN'T THE NATIONAL ARCHIVES' INFORMATION SECURITY OFFICE REVIEW HOW CONGRESS HANDLES (LEAKS!) CLASSIFIED INFORMATION?

Yes, this is some world class finger pointing on all sides.

Skittles, The Huntress
The American Patriot Cat Party

Friday, June 22, 2007

The Suitor Returns

Uh, oh! Sam, The Marmalade Cat is back to court Skittles. See the laser eyes directed at SlyCat? I hope SlyCat can blog again soon. Skittles misses him.
"Is that a parrot?"

posted by the Pet Human.

Official Stump #1-Mud Slinging


It is time for me to begin expressing my views and opinions in this campaign for president. And allow me to sling some mud too.

Yesterday Hillary Clinton posted a video on her website. You can see it here. She and hubby Bill sit down in a diner to announce the "winning campaign song." She makes him eat carrots.


My Official Opinion: THIS IS MONUMENTALLY STUPID!


What does this have to do with running our government and leading the nation?

Some of you might say, well Hillary is trying to reach out to the YouTube generation. Nonsense and hogwash! Our teens and twenty-somethings are not idiots! They know just as well as the old geezers that politics is serious stuff. Yes, it's nice to lighten the mood every now and then. But with troops killed every day in Iraq, the national debt growing, possible recession, shredded foreign policy, nuclear proliferation, etc., now is NOT the time!

Bad timing, Billary!

Sincerely,

Skittles, The Cat

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Thursday Thirteen

This is my first time participating in Thursday Thirteen! Here goes:

13 things I like about my pet human:

1. she taught me yoga and how to relax. So now I am not anti-social
2. she feeds me whatever I want, and if I don't like what she gives me, she will continue to open cans of food until I say ok.
3. she is very gentle and sweet
4. she lets me go outside. This is good, because I could never be an all indoor kitty. I would go stir crazy.
5. she lets me eat as many lizards as I like
6. she shares the computer with me
7. she understands that what I want is mine.....like the saddle blanket....mine, mine, mine!
8. I like her mom
9. she is patient
10.she works hard at keeping my garden nice
11. she lets me have friends over
12. she gave me a teddy bear
13. she loves me!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

New Cat In Town??????


I thought I found a new friend outside the bedroom door by the side deck. I thought maybe he was late to the yoga class.

My pet human started yelling.....STAY AWAY, STAY AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Uuuuggggghhhhhhhhhh.......................what's that smell?

100th Post!!!!!!

WOW!!!!! This is my 100th post. So glad you all could join me for summer yoga classes.

Please spread out your mat, and find a comfortable spot on it. Take a deep breath in through your nose...........hold, hold, hold,...............now exhale through your mouth slowly.

Follow along:


Excellent class, everyone!!!!!

Help yourself to goodies.


















































See you next Tuesday for Yoga!
Here's a close up of the Half Lord of the Fishes. Again, note the extension of the mandible and maxilla. Practice at home.


Luv,
Skittles, The Huntress

Sunday, June 17, 2007

The Bedspread Solution

HA!!!! I won't sleep on TOP of the bedspread. I will sleep UNDER the bedspread.

PROBLEM SOLVED!

I am sooooooo smart.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Snoozy Sunday

I was sleeping soundly, when I heard my pet human.

"Skittles! Wake up!!


"What?" I said.

"I know where you have been sleeping. Look at the mess!"

You must stop rolling in the dirt, and then coming into the house to sleep on the white bedspread. I insist."



"Who says???" I demanded to know.

"My dear sweet Skittles, I say so this time. This bedspread belonged to my grandmother, your great grandmother, and I cannot wash it so frequently. It will fall apart.

"Oh, alright! I'll take a bath! But who are you to be demanding of me????" I said.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Formerly Feral

Hey!!! I am "formerly" feral. Now I enjoy beautiful African art. (and I know all the in's and out's of socially acceptable hygiene.)

The Presidential Debates are coming up soon. Skeezix will be the Moderator for the debates. Currently he is accepting suggested questions to ask the Candidates. Please visit his site if you wish to submit a question to the Candidates.


Skittles, The Huntress

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Questions for the Debate

You can post questions for the presidential candidates in the upcoming debate at Skeezix blog.

http://www.skeezixthecat.com/scratchingpost/

Skeezix will be the moderator.

Skittles, The Huntress

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Yoga Classes For All Levels

Yoga classes begin next Tuesday, June 19th, here on the side deck. All levels of yoga students are welcome.

Yoga is a wonderful relaxation technique. In addition, practicing yoga improves physical and mental stamina, and flexibility. We all know how important these attributes are to cats everywhere.

RESERVATIONS ARE REQUIRED AS THERE IS LIMITED SPACE ON THE DECK!!!! PLEASE LEAVE A NOTE BELOW IF YOU WISH TO PARTICIPATE.

BYOM

Skittles, The Huntress

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Spotty Sunday



At first I thought Spotty Sunday was about showing my spots. But then I spotted a new interloper. He's more than twice my size, even bigger than Sam, The Marmalade Cat.

I don't know his name, or where he lives, but I hissed and spat at him. I screamed and yelled at the top of my lungs. Of course, the best defense is an aggressive offense, so I attacked him.

He didn't seem too perturbed. Then my Pet Human came out to see the ruckus, and she threatened him with the broom.

He sort of sauntered off at his own speed. Arrogant jackass! In my yard!

Skittles, The Huntress

Friday, June 08, 2007

Sam's Fantasies

Sam, The Marmalade Cat, still dreams about Skittles, even though she belongs to SlyCat.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

What Doesn't Belong?


Let's see.......

beautiful plants
beautiful brickwork
beautiful sunshine
beautiful tabby
tupperware

What's it doing here anyway???????

Skittles, The Huntress

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Tummy Tuesday

Advanced Bikram Yoga lends itself well to Tummy Tuesday. This position is called the Lotus, with a side twist.

Anyone wanna pet me???

Luv,

Skittles, The Huntress

Monday, June 04, 2007

Cat of the Day

Wow! I am Cat of the Day!

I am so honored. I don't know what to say. I know some of my faithful followers know my biography, yet I am so happy that Emma would spread the word to an even greater audience.

I want all my fellow traumatized feline friends to know that it does get better! Hang in there, and if this post does one kitty good, then it was all worth it.

To all the Pet Humans: don't give up on those who have had a hard life. We will come around with lots of food and love. We may even recover enough to aspire to be President!

Special thanks goes to my Auntie April in Oxnard for rescuing me from the warehouse.

Luv,
Skittles, The Huntress